Imogen Healing

Tag: life

  • It’s the most wonderful time of the year

    It’s the -Ber months! which means fall is not far behind. Fall and winter are definitely my favorite seasons. I love spring, but summer comes way too fast after. I love cold, crisp air and wearing comfortable clothes. Feeling cozy all day without sweating. The smells, the sights… I just love it and best of all, NO MOSQUITOES!

    The heat wave is gone, my gardens and dogs are so happy with the cooler weather. Mosquitoes are still here, but more manageable. My luffa has started producing and I am so excited! I am getting more into weaving, but taking my time with this hobby because I want it to last. I tend to dive all into new hobbies and discoveries and eventually burn myself out. I want to be able to do things with this one, so I am making sure I am taking breaks when my back starts to be uncomfortable, taking breaks between works, stretching, doing other things in the meantime that still fill my inspired heart.

    I’ve been having to face the reality that I may be forced to go back to work before my body is healed. I know I can’t handle a full day of work, but insurance told me they don’t understand why I can’t work, since I’m not fully incapacitated or needing surgery. I’m trying to prevent that! Ugh. My PT and I have finally found where the pain has been stemming from, which is the usual rhomboid area. I must have pulled a muscle ~13 years ago without realizing it. We’ve been needling that spot and the pain radiating from it has been getting smaller. It’s really achey right now and I missed PT yesterday but I haven’t been doing well mentally the last few days. Today, I feel a little perkier and have a little more hope. I will have to take a little time to the side today and give myself a stretch, massage, and muscle stimulation. it’s really so simple, but why is it hard for us to do the simplest, mundane things? they’re repetitive, annoying, never-ending… like laundry and doing the dishes. ME HATES EM. but, ya gotta stay on top of them or else an anthill turns into a mountain! The saying “once you stop moving, you start dying” is so true. I may have been force to slow down, but it doesn’t mean I need to come to a full stop. I just needed to sit through and readjust some perspectives. 🙂

    Here are some of the things I managed to make in August!

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    ClAKTlNuYXBjaGF0LzEzLjU1LjAuNDkgKFNNLVM5MzFVMTsgQW5kcm9pZCAxNSNTOTMxVTFVRVM1QVlFNyMzNTsgZ3ppcCkgVi9NVVNIUk9PTQ==
    ClAKTlNuYXBjaGF0LzEzLjU1LjAuNDkgKFNNLVM5MzFVMTsgQW5kcm9pZCAxNSNTOTMxVTFVRVM1QVlFNyMzNTsgZ3ppcCkgVi9NVVNIUk9PTQ==
    ClAKTlNuYXBjaGF0LzEzLjU1LjAuNDkgKFNNLVM5MzFVMTsgQW5kcm9pZCAxNSNTOTMxVTFVRVM1QVlIMiMzNTsgZ3ppcCkgVi9NVVNIUk9PTQ==

  • “Gotta have the lows to appreciate the highs”

    A friend I met in college once said this to me. It pops in my head when I find myself in the lows. We wouldn’t truly be able to appreciate where we are in the good times, if we didn’t know what it meant to be on the opposite side. The work and journey it takes to get there makes it all much sweeter. In an instant gratification world, it’s hard to keep that sense of gratitude without constantly checking in with yourself.

  • Stop to smell the flowers, dangit!

    I have been looking through old pictures and videos, and I’m so glad I did it. I started out deleting videos that are meaningless and taking up space, and ended up finding videos I forgot about or shot with intention of editing and never did. I used to take pictures of EVERYTHING, especially when I got my first 35mm digital camera for my 16th birthday nineteen years ago. Somewhere along the way, I started taking less and less photos. Maybe because it got really expensive to print them, and they just get lost in albums online. It also got to the point where I’d take so many pictures of everyone and everything around me, but no one bothered to include me in pictures, as well. We also have to pay for every little thing, such as storage, editing programs, etc.

    I never fully stopped taking pictures, but they became more limited. I know this is because of the people I surrounded myself with throughout the last 10 years. This year is different, I have put myself first for the first time in my life and things are coming together. Finding these precious videos and photos have just reminded me that I need to start taking pictures again. My phone is all dogs, nature, and selfies alone. I used to have so many pictures WITH people, but people don’t really like to stop to take pictures anymore. There’s always that fear that the way we look will be exposed.

    WELP
    GUESS WHAT?

    You look the way you look, and you need to come to terms with that. In fact, your parents, your significant other/partner, your best friends… have all seen you at your worst and still love you. Every picture of you that is taken is how you look, and what people literally see when they’re with you. Stop being so ashamed to look anything other than “perfect and flawless” when we all have flaws that make us unique, who we are, and dang lovable!

    IMPERFECTION IS PERFECTION.
    STEP INTO WHO YOU TRULY ARE.
    I LOVE YOU JUST THE WAY YOU ARE.
    I SEE YOU. I HEAR YOU. I LOVE YOU.

  • Can we talk about motivation?

    Motivation, for me, seems to come in waves. One day, I’m so positive everything will come together and work out for the best, better than I’m able to fathom at the moment. The next, meh, I just want to stay in bed all day and bedrot (a new term I’ve learned). I know I’m worth a lot more than what my life is right now, but I also know that my dreams/goals are things that require me to work on myself. I am willing to do that 100%. I tend to get impatient, it is an instant gratification world. Instant gratification is a horrible, slow mental suicide. It’s also very hard to break from and I feel like I am border-lining being a hoarder haha. I am trying to be less materialistic, I’ve stopped impulse buying silly gag items and I try not to buy new. Bringing things back to life gives you a project to do and a sense of reward when you’re done.

    It doesn’t have to be perfect.

    Afterall, imperfection is perfection.

    Everything these days are made so cheap and meant to break so the consumer has to keep buying more. Used items are so much nicer, last longer, and have character that make them unique in a world where everything is mass produced. A lot of the things I have now are art supplies and family/childhood sentimental things.

    Depression has a lot to do with it and causes me to shrink into the comfort of my home and I don’t leave for days at a time, if I’m not working or even when I’m working I’d call out. I am happy to say that these periods get shorter and shorter, and I feel stronger every time I come back from the dark.

    Cleaning up clutter, tackling laundry, dishes, the usual chores, and taking it baby steps at a time, while being gentle and kind to myself reminding myself that I have been in worse slumps and through really hard situations, I should be proud of who I am and where I am. I may not be where I thought I’d be at 35, but I am dang proud of how far I have come.