Tag: kindness

  • We need unconditional empathy.

    I want to talk about the world today. I feel myself getting closer to a crash out and those aren’t fun, or productive. Funny that these feelings and the intense push to share these thoughts fall on 9/11, 24 years later. I was living on LI at the time, going to homeroom in middle school. As I walked down the halls, still clueless of what happened, I saw several of my classmates running and crying. I got to my homeroom, and heard the news. They had it playing on the TV. Many of my classmates, neighbors, friends, family had relatives in those buildings. My uncle lived across the river and could see it all clearly.

    Don’t forget to ground yourself in this crazy world we’re experiencing. This week alone, on Tiktok, I witnessed the shooting of Charlie Kirk, the heartbreaking brutal stabbing of Iryna Zarutska, school shootings, revolutions, bombings, genocide, Epstein files, never-ending attack on women, POC, disabled, and people who are different, destroying of mother nature… And the only one that seems to be plastered all over the news more than any of the others is Charlie Kirk.

    I’m not celebrating Charlie Kirk’s death, but he died on the hill he created. I understand why people are saying “I have no empathy” for him, because he was a shitty person, don’t get me wrong.

    Empathy must thrive through things like this. We cannot allow ourselves to be desensitized to the state of the world today. If we all stooped to his level, there would be no empathy at all. The job of a narcissist is to make everyone as miserable as them, to bring someone at a higher level down to theirs (and unfortunately, this country is run by them). We want nothing more than for them to taste their own medicine. It leads to pettiness, anger, violence, continuing the cycle of hurt and unhealed trauma. We cannot allow that. We are the generation of breaking cycles. Turn inward, ground yourself. Be better for yourself so you can be better for those around you. Create, express, share truths with open minds, total transparency. I used to think America was a melting pot, because of all the different cultures in one country sharing beliefs and delicious food recipes. As more and more truths come out, it’s clear that we’ve been lied to and betrayed, made to believe if we followed their teachings we would be taken care of. Instead, we’re just constantly being pitted against each other (successfully so far) as they take every penny we make (we destroy our bodies and work our lives away just to be one paycheck away from homelessness) with insurance that doesn’t pay out when you need it but is required with literally everything, subscriptions, sell cheaply made things with the design to break and keep needing repair, charge for and gatekeep basic necessities, take away crucial education and basic rights, use AI to brainwash and take away boredom which is where healing, creativity and independency are developed, and slowly isolate us from the rest of the world. Yet, we are too busy fighting each other than fighting the real issue, to notice that this is happening right in front of our eyes, right. now.

    Fortunately, we are the creators of our own universe and we can choose love.

    We can choose UNCONDITIONAL empathy.

    We can choose to understand that that person you spilled your whole heart to, even hid some of the best parts of yourself away for acted out of hurt and unhealed traum. and instead of sitting with themselves, they chose to continue passing that hurt around. I’m still going to love you and hope that you one day choose to sit through your pain and be better. Instead of allowing that pain that wasn’t mine to bear in the first place to change who I am, I vow to never allow someone to influence me in a way that causes me to lose myself.

    We can choose to understand that we have to love that person from afar because they’re no good for you. Because they don’t know any better.

    We can choose to understand that Charlie Kirk was not one for the people.

    But his children and his wife, and everyone else who was at that debate, did not deserve to have that memory ingrained in their brains for the rest of their lives. You cannot condemn gun violence and celebrate it. If we ever want peace, if we are ever to break the cycle, we need to be better. period.

  • Stop to smell the flowers, dangit!

    I have been looking through old pictures and videos, and I’m so glad I did it. I started out deleting videos that are meaningless and taking up space, and ended up finding videos I forgot about or shot with intention of editing and never did. I used to take pictures of EVERYTHING, especially when I got my first 35mm digital camera for my 16th birthday nineteen years ago. Somewhere along the way, I started taking less and less photos. Maybe because it got really expensive to print them, and they just get lost in albums online. It also got to the point where I’d take so many pictures of everyone and everything around me, but no one bothered to include me in pictures, as well. We also have to pay for every little thing, such as storage, editing programs, etc.

    I never fully stopped taking pictures, but they became more limited. I know this is because of the people I surrounded myself with throughout the last 10 years. This year is different, I have put myself first for the first time in my life and things are coming together. Finding these precious videos and photos have just reminded me that I need to start taking pictures again. My phone is all dogs, nature, and selfies alone. I used to have so many pictures WITH people, but people don’t really like to stop to take pictures anymore. There’s always that fear that the way we look will be exposed.

    WELP
    GUESS WHAT?

    You look the way you look, and you need to come to terms with that. In fact, your parents, your significant other/partner, your best friends… have all seen you at your worst and still love you. Every picture of you that is taken is how you look, and what people literally see when they’re with you. Stop being so ashamed to look anything other than “perfect and flawless” when we all have flaws that make us unique, who we are, and dang lovable!

    IMPERFECTION IS PERFECTION.
    STEP INTO WHO YOU TRULY ARE.
    I LOVE YOU JUST THE WAY YOU ARE.
    I SEE YOU. I HEAR YOU. I LOVE YOU.

  • Can we talk about motivation?

    Motivation, for me, seems to come in waves. One day, I’m so positive everything will come together and work out for the best, better than I’m able to fathom at the moment. The next, meh, I just want to stay in bed all day and bedrot (a new term I’ve learned). I know I’m worth a lot more than what my life is right now, but I also know that my dreams/goals are things that require me to work on myself. I am willing to do that 100%. I tend to get impatient, it is an instant gratification world. Instant gratification is a horrible, slow mental suicide. It’s also very hard to break from and I feel like I am border-lining being a hoarder haha. I am trying to be less materialistic, I’ve stopped impulse buying silly gag items and I try not to buy new. Bringing things back to life gives you a project to do and a sense of reward when you’re done.

    It doesn’t have to be perfect.

    Afterall, imperfection is perfection.

    Everything these days are made so cheap and meant to break so the consumer has to keep buying more. Used items are so much nicer, last longer, and have character that make them unique in a world where everything is mass produced. A lot of the things I have now are art supplies and family/childhood sentimental things.

    Depression has a lot to do with it and causes me to shrink into the comfort of my home and I don’t leave for days at a time, if I’m not working or even when I’m working I’d call out. I am happy to say that these periods get shorter and shorter, and I feel stronger every time I come back from the dark.

    Cleaning up clutter, tackling laundry, dishes, the usual chores, and taking it baby steps at a time, while being gentle and kind to myself reminding myself that I have been in worse slumps and through really hard situations, I should be proud of who I am and where I am. I may not be where I thought I’d be at 35, but I am dang proud of how far I have come.